New Year’s Eve Updates and a Top 5

We'll end the year with two quick updates and a list of the five most popular letters of the year.

First is an update from someone who was dealing with stress.

Hey there, I was the writer of this gem, which I say sarcastically. I think that it's difficult for people to understand that there was no mourning period after my marriage ended. I spent far too long mourning its demise and my loss of self while I was in it. I'm not sure if people get that unless they've been in a situation similar to mine. It took a while for the explosion of summer anxieties to settle – which, you were right, came out of left field. It was hard to figure out where our median was while going through it. I got a pep talk from friends who have had similar situations (and some who haven't), ignored things beyond my control (like death and work), and focused on feeling and creating positive emotions for both of us. A few commenters were helpful, but honestly, I feel like a lot of people spend too much time behind a screen. We are still together – obviously the dopamine rush has settled, but our relationship is still incredibly special. Happy New Year!

Next is a quick update of a letter from last week. I love the last line.

I figured out I am definitely naïve based on your response and all the comments. It was eye-opening to say the least. It never crossed my mind that he was never really single in the first place. I try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt, but in this case I was clearly blind to what was right in front of me.

As I was reading the letter and comments, he was texting me, of course. Just mundane texts about getting his haircut and plans for the holiday. I never responded, blocked him on my phone and social media. I think the hardest part of it was that he has been the only man in a long while who has shown any continued interest in me. I sounded so desperate based on the comments I read.

If anything, I learned I am definitely guilty of trying too hard to make things work or make people like me. I need to learn that not everyone is going to like me and not everyone is honest.

One of the main reasons I decided to write was that my friends were in two camps. One camp said to give him a chance and not cut him out of my life, while the other camp pretty much said cut bait and run.

I ran, which I think is the best choice. I just keep reading your "No you didn't" line when I have some doubt. He was not the person I thought he was or created in my mind.

I think I need Almighty-Zeesus as my life coach.

Now for the Top 5 most popular letters of the year (based on page views):

5. Living with my boyfriend, in love with a guy at work

4. Cheated on my fiancé

3. He slept with his best friend

2. Confusion after a ménage à trois

1. My friend's husband is on Grindr

Be safe tonight. Send letters. See you in 2016. - Meredith