I’ve heard questionable things about my wife’s vacation

Dear Meredith,

My wife and her friends traveled to Miami Beach to celebrate turning 50 this year. The other day at work, I received a call from the husband of my wife's friend. I think I have met this guy maybe once or twice. He said that he checked his wife's text messages on the cloud and suggested I do the same. When I asked him what should I expect to find, he said, "You will see that their laid-back vacation was not about relaxing, but rather trying to get laid." His words, not mine.

I have what I consider to be a strong marriage, and I hate to think that I have to start prying into my wife's phone for dirt. My better judgement tells me to just leave this alone. If she was unfaithful, oh well, as it would not be worth the trouble to turn my life upside down at this stage of my life. I would be quite upset, however, if this was the case, and I'm not too sure I can just forget about it. Your advice would be appreciated.

– Husband


Your gut is steering you in the right direction. You'd rather not snoop, so don't. You have every reason to believe in your marriage, because texts can mean anything. Sometimes messages among friends are just a joke. Maybe they were texting about getting their collective groove back, but really they were just making light of the fact that they were at the Cheesecake Factory in Coconut Grove.

The only decision you need to make is whether you want to tell your wife about the phone call. If this guy is going to start making trouble, calling around, and telling his own wife that you're in on the snoop, you might want to get ahead of the problem. Depending on how you left it with this guy, it might be worth telling your wife that he called, but that you had no interest in his conspiracy theories. The heads up might keep you on the same team.

– Meredith

Readers? Should he check her phone? Should he tell her about the phone call?