A college crush on a ‘best friend’

We've had so many letters about college cuddling and unspoken feelings. I don't know what's going on. Give all of the definitive advice, please.

I'm in love with my best friend. I know – so cliché. We became fast friends our freshman year of college and have spent practically every free second together since.

We've even earned nicknames from our friends because we're always together. We did a joint costume for Halloween (it was really cute). We're extremely affectionate toward one another, often holding hands or cuddling in bed while watching movies.

I haven't asked him out and honestly never thought I'd ever get the chance to because he'd been dating the same girl on and off for around two years. They broke up about a week ago (for perhaps the 3rd or 4th time) and I'm really thinking about confessing my feelings to him. You know, a new year and a fresh sense of optimism.

Of course, there's the ever-present fear that my feelings won't be reciprocated and I could ruin a perfect friendship. He is my best friend and was that before anything else. Is it worth being honest about the feelings I've developed as we've continued college or should I just let it go and hope for the best?

– Hoping for the best


It's time to ask questions and confess your feelings. You're already cuddling in bed together; your need for this conversation shouldn't shock him.

As we learned from Friday's letter, timing is a big deal, and if you're both single – finally – you don't want to miss your chance to find out whether this can turn into a romantic relationship. Do not wait too long or talk yourself out of disclosure. It's scary, for sure, but so is the idea of putting this off for another year (or more).

This fear of losing a best friend makes sense; he's your constant companion. But if he's a good friend, he will want you to know where you stand. Also, yes, rejection is terrible, so I get why you're delaying this. But from my experience, missed opportunities feel worse.

– Meredith

Readers? Is it time to share feelings? Did you cuddle with friends in college?