Also, tickets for the Love Letters book launch event with Spotlight's Sacha Pfeiffer are now on sale. Join us in Harvard Square.
I don't like social media. I do use Twitter and Snapchat, and I use one of my guy friend's Instagram accounts to see what's on there sometimes.
Whenever I'm on this friend's Instagram account, I see someone I really like. I've never met him in person, but he has a connection to my friend. Really, I don't know much about him, but I have this thing where I develop crushes on people and they wind up being all I want. Based on what I see of this guy on Instagram, I think we would be perfect together. It's not even and that he's cute, it's more about what he posts and what my mutual friends tell me about him. I guess I kind of fell for his personality without actually meeting or talking to him.
There's some distance between us (hours), but I know he comes to my town to visit his family. Should I pursue this and reach out to him based on his Instagram ... or just leave it alone because this is all in my head?
If the options are a) continue to analyze everything you see about this person on Instagram or b) contact him to get to know him in real life, I'd go for b. There's nothing to lose here, right? He doesn't even live in town, so it's not as if you'd be messing up the dynamics of a shared friend group if it turns out he's not interested.
Just know that you're reaching out with no real information about this man. You have not fallen for his personality "without meeting or talking to him." All you've done is create a narrative about him based on photos and filters. Maybe he'll live up to your expectations – or even exceed them. But ... all you know right now is that you're interested in learning more.
Please know that you are allowed to tell friends that you want to reach out to this person. Someone might want to make the introduction. Sometimes that's what friends are for.
Readers? Should she reach out? Any warnings?